terrible horrible no good very bad day

the reader's digest format:

last week i took asher in for his 18 month checkup.  i could tell his breathing wasn't up to par, but wasn't thinking we'd be doing a breathing treatment upon arrival.  fortunately after one treatment his oxygen level was at an acceptable level.  unfortunately he still had to go on his inhaler and steroids for a week.  these steroids really make for a horrible time for all.  the poor little guys spends most of his time crying and angry.  and the rest of us are miserable as well!  

last wednesday can be marked as one of the worst days ever in my parenting.  asher cried most of the afternoon.  he woke up from his nap at 1:15(usually 3).  when i opened his door i found isaac already in asher's crib with him.  no sooner did i realize that he had pooped and it was all over!  i carried isaac(all 47 lbs of him!) to the bathroom to clean him up before attempting to clean up asher.  poor little guy had it caked on his face!  i can't even put into words the kind of cleanup that was required(my 21 week pregnant belly climbing in the crib to scrub), asher screaming the entire time.  i asked the big boys to help me by watching him.  our boys don't understand this concept.  the rest of the afternoon was spent trying to soothe asher.  at one point i put him down to get dinner on the table.  i came around the corner to see isaac chasing asher as he pulled the lamp out of the wall and was about to pull it off the table.  my wonderful response, "what the hell is going on around here?"  clearly i said it in a funny voice as they all laughed and thought is was more of a call to start the party.  30 seconds later the lamp exploded(my one new purchase not from a garage sale or craigslist for our new place).  this put everyone in tears(i almost joined them in the sob-fest).  i ended up putting everyone to bed early and apologizing for my lack of patience.  once everyone was in bed i found myself in tears as i read an email about mom's getting in the picture. that just about put me over for the night.  i am going to blame it on the hormones as well as the pure exhaustion:) 

stew returned from youth group later that evening to a wife who didn't think she would make it.  i was certain i would never survive 4 kids,  5 and under(we'll soon find out).  fortunately a good night sleep does wonders for an exhausted pregnant mom.  the rest of the week was a tad bit better (not great) and once asher was off his steroid, life seemed to settle down.  

a picture from that horrible day.  

this mommy needs a lot of grace!  i am finding that i have less and less together.  funny how kids can help you see the best and worst in yourself.  a sweet friend came over a couple of days ago.  it was good to chat and talk about how difficult it can be to raise children when they are so close in age.  it has so many perks, but it also brings so many challenges.  i am learning a lot about myself and hope that i don't leave this stage of life unchanged.